FLYING CRABS...

I DREAMED THAT THE WORLD WAS INVADED BY FLYING CRABS . SO WE HAD TO HIRE A PSYCHIATRIST TO CONVINCE THEM THAT CRABS CANNOT FLY .

ELVIS THE COCKROACH

I DREAMED I SAW A COCKROACH WHO TOLD ME HIS NAME WAS ELIVS PRESLEY...I KNEW IT WAS TRUE BECAUSE ALL THE GIRL COCKROACHES WERE GETTING REALLY WET .

BEAUTIFUL WORLD

I DREAMED THAT EVERY PERSON IN THIS WORLD TURNED INTO A LLAMA...AND IN  A FEW SHORT YEARS...THE WORLD BECAME BEAUTIFUL AGAIN .

BEEF FARMER...

I DREAMED I WAS A BEEF FARMER...BUT ALL MY COWS HAD BOUGHT GUNS AND MADE ME DO UNSPEAKABLE THINGS .

PLANET EARTH...

I DREAMED THAT PLANET EARTH GREW WINGS...AND FLEW DIRECTLY INTO THE SUN .

ASS HOLES

I DREAMED THAT THE ONLY THING IN THIS WORLD THAT WASN'T FULL OF SHIT...WERE ASS HOLES .

BOAT AT SEA...

I DREAMED MY BOAT WAS AT SEA...AND SOMEONE PUT A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM TO MAKE WAY FOR A SWIMMING POOL .

END OF THE WORLD...

I DREAMED THAT THE WORLD CAME TO AN END...AT WHICH POINT , I REALIZED IT WAS NEVER THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE .

TEETH FALLING OUT...

I DREAMED THAT MY TEETH FELL OUT OF MY ASS...AND I HAD NOTHING LEFT TO SAY .

LAZY ANTS...

I DREAMED THAT ALL THE ANTS BECAME LAZY DRUNKS...AND ATE THEIR QUEEN JUST FOR THE FUCK OF IT .

COFFEE WITH BEE...

I DREAMED I HAD COFFEE WITH A BUMBLE BEE...WE JUST LAUGHED AND BUZZED THE WHOLE AFTERNOON .

KIND ALIENS...

 

 

I DREAMED THAT THE WORLD WAS INVADED BY KIND HEARTED ALIENS...THEY TOOK ALL OUR WORMS...SAID..."THANK YOU FOR THE WORMS"...THEN BUGGERED OFF BACK INTO OUTER-SPACE.

   

godzilla vs rodan...

i dreamed that "godzilla" was caught having sex with "rodan"...so he felt compelled to destroy the world...to keep his dignity .

GIANT TURD FROM OUTER-SPACE...

I DREAMED THAT A 2000 FOOT TURD CAME FROM OUTER-SPACE AND DECLARED WAR ON EARTH...AFTER MUST DISTRESS...I SINGLE- HANDEDLY DEFEATED THE TURD...ONLY TO BE SHUNNED FOR SMELLING BADLY .

WALKING BY THE WOOD PILE

I DREAMED I WAS WALKING BY THE WOOD PILE...ON A SNOWY EVENING...AND WAS BITTEN BY A LARGE UNIDENTIFIABLE RODENT...WHO I PROCEEDED TO HACK TO BITS WITH AN AXE...AIN'T NATURE FUCKING BEAUTIFUL . 

THE BED BUG...

I DREAMED THAT A BED BUG HOPPED ON MY BED AND FIDDLED ME A TUNE GOODNIGHT...( AND I THOUGHT HE WAS MY FRIEND ) .

RAT IN MY KITCHEN...

I DREAMED THERE WAS A RAT IN MY KITCHEN . AND HE MADE ME BREAKFAST IN BED .

DUCKS...

I DREAMED I WAS A FARMER...AND WAS EATEN BY SOME DUCKS...BUT THEY ALL SAID GRACE BEFORE THEY ATE ME .

FLUSHING PLANET EARTH...

I DREAMED THAT GOD PUT PLANET EARTH INTO A TOILET...THEN FLUSHED IT INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION...AND EVERYONE THOUGHT IT WAS A CIRCUS RIDE .

LIZARD WITH NO SCALES...

I DREAMED MY LIZARD HAD NO SCALES . SO HE TOOK UP DROPPING ACID .

ETERNITY...

I DREAMED THAT ETERNITY...WAS SWALLOWED BY A MINOR LEAGUE HOCKEY REFEREE...WHO THREE DAYS LATER WOULD CRAP IT OUT .  

MY PONY

I DREAMED THAT MY PONY WON THE LOTTERY...AND BECAME AN ALCOHOLIC .

ROCK LANGUAGE

I DREAMED I WAS A ROCK IN OUTER-SPACE...AND EVENTUALLY I DISCOVERED ALL THE SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE...BUT I HAD NO WAY TO COMMUNICATE THEM TO OTHERS...SO EVERYTHING CONTINUED TO GO TO SHIT .

THE LETTER...

I DREAMED I DROPPED A LETTER INTO A BLACK HOLE . BUT I FORGOT THE STAMP .

led puppy

I dreamed that my dog grew wings ; but his feet became as led .

my cat's struggle...

I dreamed that my cat was swallowed by a per-historic bird ; but dug his way out of the monsters ass hole and entered a new dimension .

CUP OF COFFEE

I DREAMED THAT I TRADED IN MY OCEAN...FOR A CUP OF COFFEE .

FIRST CHURCH OF RATS WITH NO TAILS

I dreamed that my rat had no tail . So he opened a religion called : " The first church of rats with long tails " . He was the president , and killed anyone who had no tail .

THE DOVE OF PEACE

I DREAMED THAT THE DOVE OF PEACE...WAS ATTACKED BY BAT OF DESPAIR...I DRANK A RUM AND COKE AS THE BATTLE RAGED ON .

SHIT MONSTER...

I DREAMED I BECAME BEST FRIENDS WITH THE SHIT MONSTER ; BUT ONE DAY WE WENT SWIMMING IN A LAKE AND HE DISAPPEARED .