I WON !!!

I DREAMED I WAS NAMED " DREAM INVESTIGATOR" OF THE PLANET...AND THEY GAVE ME A SOLID GOLD POCKET PUSSY .

THE ARMY...

I DREAMED THAT YOU WERE DRAFTED INTO THE ARMY...AND I BEGGED THEM TO TAKE YOUR PLACE .

YOUR MOTHER PISSED ALL OVER ME .

THE RIVER AND DELUSION...

I DREAMED THAT THE RIVER FLOWED WITH DELUSION...AND THE ENTIRE WORLD WAS BATHING IN IT .

THE BROWN BEAR...

I DREAMED THAT THE BROWN BEAR RAN AWAY FROM THE SASQUATCH...AS THE YOUNG COUPLE SMOKED A REEFER IN THE CANOE .

THE BIRDS...SPINNING

I DREAMED THAT THERE WERE THESE BIRDS GOING AROUND AND ROUND OVER THIS BODY OF WATER...BUT WHEN I LOOKED UP...I REALIZED THEY WERE STILL SPINNING...RIGHT UNTIL THEY REACHED THE NEAREST PLANET .

THE RIVERS RAN WITH SAND...

I DREAMED THAT THE RIVERS RAN WITH SAND...AND PEOPLE SPLASHED AND PLAYED UNTIL ETERNITY TURNED INTO SPRING TIME .

I DREAMED THAT WORDS...

I DREAMED THAT WORDS BEGAN TO LOOK LIKE PEOPLE .

JESUS AND THE TRANSVESTITE...

I DREAMED THAT I WAS WITH JESUS AND HE RAISED SOME MAN FROM THE DEAD...THE MAN TURNED OUT TO BE A DRAG QUEEN AND THE CROWD BEGAN TO PICK UP ROCKS .

2 YEARS IN THE DESERT...

YEA , I GUESS EVERY PLACE HAS IT'S IMPERFECTIONS...ALL IN ALL...WHAT I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE ABOUT AUSTRALIA...WAS EVERY ANIMAL...INCLUDING BIBLE COLLEGE TEACHERS...WANTED ME FUCKING DEAD...I TRIED NOT TO TAKE IT PERSONALLY...BUT...AFTER ALL...IT WAS PERSONAL...LUV STU 

UPON THE LAKE...

I DREAMED THAT POCAHONTAS WAS MASTURBATING UPON A LAKE...AND EACH WAVE GAVE HER AN ORGASM .

THE BAT LOST HIS WINGS...

I DREAMED THAT THE BAT LOST ITS WINGS...AND HE COULDN'T HEAR VERY WELL IN THE FIRST PLACE...AND THE BAT WAS IMPOTENT AND STUPID .

THE LOON AND THE SUN...

I DREAMED THAT A LOON FLEW INTO THE SUN...BUT IT TOOK HIM OVER A WEEK TO FIND A LAKE TO SWIM IN .

THE SPARROW...

I DREAMED I SAW A SPARROW FLYING THROUGH THE AIR...AND THERE WAS A TOASTER TIED TO HIS LEG .

EVERY STAR IN THE SKY...

I DREAMED THAT SOMEONE  TOOK EVERY STAR IN THE UNIVERSE AND SOLD THEM IN A YARD SALE...THEN BLEW ALL THE MONEY ON BOOZE .

TURTLE SOUP

I DREAMED THAT A TURTLE TURNED HIMSELF OVER...RIPPED OUT HIS INSIDES...AND MADE HIMSELF INTO TURTLE SOUP...THING IS...HIS FARTS BLEW THE SOUP ONTO THE DIRT AND NOBODY COULD EAT IT .

BATHROOM KITTY...

I DREAMED THAT MY CAT USED MY TOILET ALL BY HERSELF...BUT THEN SHE FORGOT TO WASH HER HANDS .

A UNIVERSE...

I DREAMED THAT A UNIVERSE FELL OUT OF MY POCKET AND WENT DOWN THE DRAIN...THE CAT CLAWED AT IT BUT COULDN'T GET IT OUT .

SOUNDS LIKE SEX

I DREAMED IT WAS RAINING BOX JELLYFISH...AND WHEN THEY HIT THE SIDEWALK...IT SOUNDED LIKE SEX .

MY PLATYPUS...

I DREAMED MY PET PLATYPUS GOT STOCK IN THE DRAIN...AND HIS CHILDREN MADE FUN OF HIM .

THE MOON...

I DREAMED THAT THE MOON FELL INTO LITTLE PIECES...AND THEY FLEW INTO THE ASTEROID BELT AND DANCED UNTIL JESUS RETURNED .

PENGUIN BEHIND THE PULPIT

I DREAMED THAT THE LOCAL CHURCH ELECTED A PENGUIN AS THEIR NEW CLERGYMAN...HIS FIRST SERMON WAS ON THE COMING OF THE KILLER WHALES...THEY WERE JUST GLAD THAT IT WASN'T ON SEXUAL IMMORALITY .

MY PET SNAKE...

I DREAMED MY PET SNAKE GREW 40 LEGS...AND JUGGLED 43 BASEBALLS ALL AT THE SAME TIME...HE SAID IT WAS PART OF HIS RELIGION .

ON THE BEACH...

I DREAMED THAT THE WAVES TURNED INTO HANDS...AND STUMBLED UPON THE BEACH .

SHORT CUTS...

I DREAMED THERE WAS A SHORT CUT TO THE MOON...SO SHORT , IN FACT...YOU COULD JUMP ON IT FROM CAPE SPLIT .

GREEN CHEESE...

I DREAMED THAT THE SUN WAS MADE OUT OF GREEN CHEESE...AND ALL THE MOUSE ASTRONAUTS FLEW INTO IT AND BURNED TO DEATH .

YETI VS SASQUATCH

I DREAMED THAT ALL THE SASQUATCH AND ALL THE YETI...HAD A RACIAL WAR...AND HUNTED EACH OTHER TO EXTINCTION .

POCKET PUSSY...

I DREAMED THAT A YETI WENT TO THE MALL TO BUY A POCKET PUSSY...BUT THEY DIDN'T HAVE HIS SIZE .

THE TIDAL WAVE

I DREAMED THAT A TIDAL WAVE CRASHED UPON ME WHILE I WAS TAKING A BATH .