PISSING PONY...

I DREAMED THAT MY PONY PISSED IN THE OCEAN...AND WHEN HE FINISHED PISSING...THE OCEAN WAS DRY .

THE SHIT MONSTER...

I DREAMED THAT WE MADE THE "SHIT MONSTER" CLEAN UP...SO HE DID...THEN HE DISAPPEARED...AND , BOY...DID WE FEEL BAD .

GIANT , BLUE SPACE MONKEY...

I DREAMED THAT EARTH COLLIDED WITH A GIANT , BLUE SPACE MONKEY...AND HE LICKED ALL THE HURT AND PAIN RIGHT OFF THE PLANET .

VALDY

I DREAMED I HEARD " SIMPLE LIFE " ...I AWOKE IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE...AND MY SPIRIT FLEW AROUND MY BED .

HAMSTER SEX...

I DREAMED THAT MY RAT GOT SEXUALLY CONFUSED...AND STARTED HAVING SEX WITH MY HAMSTER...MY MOUSE GOT SELF-RIGHTEOUSLY PISSED...AND THREW A BIBLE AT THE PAIR OF THEM .

ITALIAN ROAST...

I DREAMED THAT MY COFFEE CUP SAILED OUT TO SEA...AND A DOLPHIN FILLED IT WITH ITALIAN ROAST .

MY PROSTITUTE...

I DREAMED THAT MY FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD  PROSTITUTE...HAD A "TWO FOR ONE SALE"...BUT SINCE I COULDN'T "GET IT UP" A SECOND TIME...I GOT A FREE PUPPY .

SPACE BADGERS...

I DREAMED THAT SPACE BADGERS INVADED THE EARTH...AND PEED IN ALL THE SWIMMING POOLS .

WALK THE LINE...

I DREAMED  I WALKED THE LINE BETWEEN SANITY AND GENIUS...THEN...SUDDENLY...WITHOUT WARNING...I PISSED ALL OVER IT .

THE FOUR HORSEMEN...

I DREAMED THAT THE FOUR HORSEMAN OF THE APOCALYPSES GOT REALLY DRUNK...AND CRASHED INTO HUDSON BAY...AND WERE RESCUED BY A FLEET OF WHALES .

SEVEN BATS...

I DREAMED THAT THERE WERE SEVEN BATS PLAYING FIDDLES ON THE BEACH...A TUNA WAS STANDING ON THE WATER...WEEPING UNCONTROLLABLY .

THE BOY IN THE LAKE...

I DREAMED THAT MR. PORCUPINE SAW A CHILD DROWNING IN A LAKE...SO HE SWALLOWED EVERY OUNCE OF WATER  AND BRIBED HIM TO GET OUT WITH A "MARS BAR" .

HE WAS A STUPID FUCKING KID .

MR . PORCUPINE...

I DREAMED THAT MR . PORCUPINE STEPPED INTO A PHONE BOOTH...EMERGED A SUPERHERO...AND RID THE WORLD OF DR . RACCOON AND HIS EVIL GANG OF TERRORISTS .

CHARLES DARWIN...

I DREAMED A BIRD FLEW THROUGH MY WINDOW...AND EXPLAINED TO ME WHY CHARLES DARWIN WAS EATEN BY A GIANT TOASTER .

RUDOLPH...

I DREAMED THAT I WAS RUDOLPH...AND I WAS SICK AND TIRED OF REINDEER GAMES .

TREE FROG...

I DREAMED THAT MY TREE FROG...ATE MY TREE...AND THEN CRAPPED OUT A SET OF TABLES AND CHAIRS .

SURFIN ' SASQUATCH...

I DREAMED THAT A SASQUATCH CAME RIDING THROUGH THE DESERT ON A SURF BOARD...HE WAS SMOKING A JOINT , LISTENING TO "THE BEACH BOYS" .

MONKEY AND BANANAS..

I DREAMED I WAS A MONKEY WHO SAILED AROUND THE WORLD...ONLY TO DISCOVER ALL I REALLY WANTED...WAS BANANAS .

THE BLACK NIGHT...

I DREAMED THAT THE BLACK NIGHT WAS CAUGHT ON VIDEO EATING A BOOGER...HE EVENTUALLY COMMITTED SUICIDE BECAUSE OF THE SHAME .

RACCOON'S

I DREAMED THAT ALL THE RACCOON'S ATE ALL THE SQUIRRELS...THEN WROTE AND PERFORMED A PLAY ABOUT HOW THEY DON'T EAT SQUIRRELS .

THE MOON...AGAIN

I DREAMED THAT I SHOVELED THE MOON INTO HUDSON BAY...THEN COVERED IT WITH A PLASTIC TARP .

BUTTERFLY AND FROG...

I DREAMED THAT A BUTTERFLY MATED WITH A FROG...THEIR CHILD BECAME A DRUG ADDICT .

MY RACCOON...

I DREAMED THAT MY RACCOON PLAYED A BANJO WITH THE BOY FROM "DELIVERANCE "...THEN HE SQUEALED LIKE A PIG .

ON THE BEACH...

I DREAMED I WALKED ACROSS THE ATLANTIC OCEAN...AND SPRAINED MY ANKLE ON THE BEACH IN SPAIN .

MY BULLFROG...

I DREAMED THAT MY BULLFROG SNEAKED INTO MY LIQUOR CABINET...AND DRANK ALL OF MY RUM .

GO FISH...

I DREAMED I WAS IN THE WOODS...AND I STUMBLED UPON A FAMILY OF SASQUATCH PLAYING " GO FISH "...ONE OF THEM SEEMED TO BE CHEATING...ANOTHER WOULD NOT STOP FIDGETING WITH HIS BALLS...THE THIRD WAS TOO STONED TO GIVE A FUCK .

I DREAMED I WAS A CABBAGE...

I DREAMED I WAS A CABBAGE...BUT NOT JUST ANY CABBAGE...BUT ONE WHO LIKED HAVING SEX WITH BUNNIES .

THE BUNNIES WERE CONFUSED .

BLOW FISH...

I DREAMED I WAS A BLOW FISH...AND SOME FUCKING HAMMERHEAD SHARK FORCED ME TO MAKE HIM MY PIMP .

ME AND MY MONKEY...

I DREAMED THAT MY MONKEY HAD WINGS...AND STOLE ALL THE BANANAS AND FLEW AWAY .